


Apple Pie Made For Rough and Rowdy Brothers

by HellsLittleLiar



Series: O let me, true in love, but truly write [2]
Category: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Established Relationship, Fluff, Found Family, M/M, Past Abuse, a lot of talk about pie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2020-11-27
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:21:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27730708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HellsLittleLiar/pseuds/HellsLittleLiar
Summary: After last year's disaster of a Christmas Dinner with Jaskier's family, this year Jaskier and Geralt are going to spend their day with Geralt's family. They will have a much better time of it.
Relationships: Aiden/Lambert (The Witcher), Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
Series: O let me, true in love, but truly write [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2024696
Comments: 29
Kudos: 313





	Apple Pie Made For Rough and Rowdy Brothers

“This is going to be wonderful.” Jaskier mumbled to himself as he pulled his masterpiece out of the oven and sniffed the delicious scent of the crispy golden-brown pastry. “We are going to have a lovely time and I am not going to get yelled at because they are all so nice and sweet and would never be mean to me.”

“That’s right.”

Jaskier squeaked and almost dropped his pie. “Oh! I didn’t know you were there.”

His darling Geralt smiled apologetically and pecked Jaskier’s cheek. “Beloved, I know you are nervous but you must know by now that my family all adore you.”

He flushed at the presumption. Adored him? No, no, he would never dare think that Geralt’s lovely family were any fonder of him than they had to be. They were kind, though, which was more than he could say of his own family. “I’m sure they like me okay.”

“They like you a lot, much more than they like me.”

“Did they say that to you?” Jaskier demanded to know. If they had told Geralt such a horrible thing, Jaskier would storm in there and give them a piece of his mind, anxieties and desire to be accepted be damned. Geralt gave a reassuring hum and kissed his cheek again.

“They would never, beloved, I promise. I am sorry I did not realise such a joke would upset you.”

Jaskier burrowed his face into Geralt’s chest as his darling wrapped strong arms around him, encasing him in the warmest, softest place he could ever hope to be. He sighed happily. “Darling, I simply can’t stand the thought of anyone being cruel to you.” He cupped Geralt’s cheek with the palm of his hand and Geralt leaned into it. “You’re so kind and gentle, I cannot imagine anyone wanting to hurt you like my family hurt me.”

Geralt tightened his arms. “They will not hurt you again, beloved.”

“I know.” Jaskier smiled up at him. “You won’t let them.”

* * *

“You remember Vesemir said we didn’t need to bring anything.”

“I know, but it’s so rude to just show up empty handed!” Jaskier argued, clutching his pie to his chest as though Geralt would take it from him. Of course, he would never do such a thing.

Geralt chuckled. “Vesemir expects us all to show up empty handed at this point. It’s practically tradition.”

“But I’m a guest! And I’ve made this pie! And I’m going to give it to Vesemir as thanks for inviting me to spend Christmas with you all and you can’t stop me.”

Geralt held his hands up in surrender and smiled down at him with such soft tenderness, any onlookers would have thought he was madly in love. (He was)

* * *

Jaskier felt himself shake as they walked down the street to Vesemir’s house. He stared down at the apple pie he clutched in his hands and tried to remember the reaction his own family had to it at last year’s Christmas dinner. He had been so distracted by Geralt’s presence that he hadn’t gotten any proper feedback. Then again, their usual feedback was to tear apart the appearance of it verbally and scoff at how effeminate it was for a man to cook, until Jaskier felt so ashamed that he hid in the bathroom for a while. Whenever he returned to the table, the pie was always completely demolished, leaving him with nothing but dirty dishes to scrub.

Would it be good enough? (Would Jaskier be good enough?) Was it a good enough offering for Vesemir and Eskel and Lambert? Geralt told him they tore through food like wild animals – was the pie big enough? Would Vesemir be offended that Jaskier brought pie even though he instructed them not to? Did Geralt’s family even like pie? Would they be mad at him for bringing one? Would they punish him for it? He could almost feel the texture of the pie as his face smashed against it while Valdo’s hand held him in place. He would practically hear his family laughing in amusement as he attempted and failed to squirm free.

Geralt watched him tremble with concern. He stopped walking and turned to face Jaskier. “Beloved, what’s the matter?”

“What if Vesemir doesn’t _like_ apple pie?”

“He does, I promise.”

“But what if it’s… made wrong?”

“It’s not. You make pie at least once a month. You know exactly what you’re doing. This one will be just as delicious and filling as the last one you made and every one before that.” Geralt paused and regarded him with an intense stare. “Beloved?”

“Yes, darling?”

“Vesemir likes you, already. If he didn’t, he would have informed us by now. He’s never held back on criticising my life choices before. He approves of you as my partner and he enjoys you as a person.”

Jaskier flushed and ducked his head in embarrassment at being so transparent. “I’m sorry, I’m being stupid. I’m just… nervous.”

“You’re not stupid.” Geralt corrected softly. “You’re traumatised.”

“Yeah.” Jaskier gave a tired grin. “I am.”

* * *

“FUCK YEAH! PIE!” Was the first thing they heard as they approached Vesemir’s house before the front door was flung open and an enthused Lambert raced out to pick Jaskier up at the waist and swing him around in a bizarre dance. “I LOVE YOU!”

Jaskier giggled at the attention and Geralt pretended to snarl jealously, only making him giggle more.

“Have you already started on the mulled wine?”

“Nope! Vesemir was making us wait for you two but now you’re here so we can finally start drinking _and_ you’ve bought some delicious fucking pie! I love pie!”

“And here I thought you loved me.”

Lambert sniffed and stuck his nose in the air snobbishly. “I can love two things.”

He plucked the pie carefully out of Jaskier’s hands and skipped back to the house. He was at the door before he turned around to face them again. “Well? Aren’t you coming?”

Geralt reached down to take Jaskier’s now empty hands, which were grasping at the empty air to find something to cling to for comfort. He gave him a reassuring squeeze. Jaskier smiled up at him and together they began walking forwards, to his first ever family Christmas dinner.

* * *

Lambert held the pie aloft over his head and danced around the table, chanting “Pie! Pie! I love pie! I can’t wait to eat this fucking pie! Pie! Pie! I love pie!”

His boyfriend, Aiden, grabbed him around the waist to stop him from moving and Eskel quickly stole the pie and squirrelled it away into the kitchen. Lambert pouted. “But… but… my pie!”

“It’s not your pie, asshole.” Eskel snorted at the same time Aiden cooed “Sorry, babe, you’ve gotta share your pie with the rest of us.”

Aiden gasped and pulled Lambert down to sit on his lap, grinning at the redness around his boyfriend’s ears. “Don’t be mean to my baby.”

“Don’t baby my brother” Eskel laughed.

Jaskier leaned into Geralt’s side as he watched the scene from the doorway with wide eyes and pink cheeks. He was unsure how to react to this loud and rowdy scene; his only experience with Christmas dinner having been terribly formal and stiff with each move watched and judged harshly. Nobody was looking at him now, all far too busy joking and laughing with each other to pay attention to the intruder on their party. As if sensing his thoughts, Geralt pressed a quick kiss to Jaskier’s temple.

“Well, Lambert _is_ the baby brother.” Geralt called out to the others as he led Jaskier over to the table and pulled his chair out for him like a gentleman. Jaskier blushed and took his seat, looking shyly over to Geralt’s brothers. They didn’t laugh, like his own siblings would have, at Jaskier being “treated like a woman”. Geralt didn’t pull his chair out from under him as a joke, like Valdo would have. Instead, Eskel reached over and ruffled Jaskier’s hair gently, keeping his hand in Jaskier’s line of sight and moving slowly so he wouldn’t startle him. Aiden winked at him from across the table, wrapping his arms more firmly around Lambert’s waist. Lambert pouted and fluttered his eyelashes at Jaskier.

“Jaskier,” Lambert whined. “My one and only true love whom is the only person here who cares for me-”

Aiden snorted.

“-PLEASE, let me have a slice of your delicious fucking pie.”

“U-um,” Jaskier stuttered. “D-don’t you want dinner first?”

Lambert groaned and flopped bonelessly onto the table in front of him. “But it smells so fucking good! Come on, just a tiny little slice!”

“Leave him alone, Lambert.” Geralt growled protectively, curling his arms over Jaskier’s shoulders. Jaskier’s eyes widened. Geralt was trying to protect him from his own family, not just Jaskier’s. Not that Jaskier needed protecting from Lambert – they were friends! Or at least, Jaskier considered Lambert a friend and he believed Lambert considered the same, but who knew what on earth really went through that man’s head?

“You can have the pie.” Jaskier consented.

“Yes!” Lambert pumped his fist in celebration.

“If Vesemir says you can have the pie.”

“No!” He wailed and flopped back onto the table.

“That is my answer, Lambert.” Vesemir agreed as he walked into the room, holding an open bottle of wine. “How did you guess?”

“You’re not funny.” Lambert mumbled.

* * *

Jaskier’s mouth watered as the veritable feast was placed in front of him and Aiden by their boys. When he had tried to offer help, he was shooed away, so he sat at the table feeling distinctly useless. Aiden grinned over to him.

“I’m not allowed to help either. They think it’s rude to make the guests do any of the work.”

He had never spent Christmas day not working before. He had never been allowed to sit back and relax and enjoy the holiday. Now he could take the time to appreciate the time spent with his favourite people and the delicious food Vesemir had cooked for them.

He sat politely as the boys placed the buffet in the middle of the table, ready for them to dig into. All of a sudden, Jaskier felt completely overwhelmed at the amount of it and the vast array of choice. He rubbed his palms on his trousers, hoping nobody could see him sweating nervously. He didn’t want them to question his idiotic indecision about what to put on his plate. It wasn’t as though he had a choice before, at his parent’s house. There had always been a starter which his mother made so she could claim to be a diligent housewife who took care of her home and her family, and they all ignored the fact that it was the one time a year she would attempt to cook. Then there was the main course which the kitchen staff prepared on Christmas Eve and was warmed up in the microwave. Of course, after that there was dessert which Jaskier was expected to prepare but was never allowed to eat.

Now Jaskier was confronted with choice. What if he took too much food? Would they think him greedy? What if he didn’t take enough food? Vesemir might think he didn’t enjoy his cooking. Would he be upset? Would it make him hate Jaskier if he didn’t take enough food? Would all of them hate Jaskier if Vesemir did? Did they hate him already? Maybe they were being kind to him out of pity. Or because he was dating Geralt. Maybe Geralt hated him. He must hate Jaskier, he was so perfect and Jaskier was so stupid, awful, idiotic. He couldn’t do anything right, he was pathetic and a waste of space. He felt his breath hitch.

Geralt picked up the empty plate in front of Jaskier. “May I make up your plate, beloved?”

Jaskier felt himself melt in response. Geralt was taking care of him, yet again. “Y-yes please, darling. I don’t know where to start; it all looks so good!”

Of course Geralt had been able to tell Jaskier was panicking. His darling Geralt was so good to him, so sweet. Jaskier would give him so many thank you kisses when they got home. Geralt took a little bit from each dish on the table and added it to Jaskier’s plate before even considering his own. On the other side of the table, Lambert, Aiden and Eskel grabbed at the food and shovelled bites into their mouths as they made up their own plates. Vesemir sat next to Geralt and rolled his eyes as he added his own food to his plate at a much more sedate pace.

Geralt put the plate in front of Jaskier and looked at him with such an adorably hopeful expression, that Jaskier couldn’t resist leaning over and pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. “Thank you, darling. You’re too sweet to me.”

Geralt leaned back into his own chair, looking rather pleased with himself as he tucked into his own dinner.

Lambert jokingly shook his fist at Geralt. “Don’t look so smug, you prick! You’re not the only fucker at this table who’s dating the love of his life, you know!”

“I’m the love of your life?” Aiden asked softly as his eyes shone.

“Pfft.” Lambert said because he did not know how to deal with his own emotions, even though they were all aware he had quite a lot of them. “No.. I meant I’m dating the love of Geralt’s life. Jaskier, we’re dating now. That means you have to make me pie every single day.”

“Do I get a say in this?” Jaskier raised an amused eyebrow.

“Nope!”

“Hm.” Geralt frowned.

“But what do I get out of it? You get pie _and_ a super hot boyfriend, but what do I get?”

“You would get my love!”

“But I already have that.” He blew a kiss at Lambert, which Aiden pretended to catch and throw back at him.

“Alas!” Lambert threw a dramatic hand over his eyes. “My plan has been foiled! Whatever shall I do now?”

Aiden gave a put upon sigh. “I guess you’re stuck with me now, babe.” He plucked Lambert’s hand from his face and linked their fingers together.

Eskel wrinkled his nose in fake annoyance. “Ugh. All four of you are gross. Some of us are single and have to witness this, you know.”

“You’re welcome to join us at any time, hot stuff.” Aiden winked and Eskel’s eye twitched.

“… No thanks.”

* * *

Jaskier had no idea what to expect when Vesemir asked to have a word with him in private, as Geralt and his brothers cleared the table and Aiden lounged on the sofa, groaning that he had eaten far too much. Had Jaskier upset Vesemir somehow? Was he going to ask him to leave? Had he talked too much during dinner? Or not enough? Was Vesemir going to tell Jaskier he wasn’t good enough for his son? (Jaskier knew that, of course, it was a simple fact.) Would he try to stop him from dating Geralt? He wouldn’t stop, obviously, unless Geralt dumped him and Geralt had absolutely no plans to dump him. Jaskier knew this because Geralt had made it perfectly clear, very bluntly and with some very explicit language that he would never break up with him. Then he had apologised for all the swearing, in case it had upset Jaskier.

But if Vesemir had doubts about their relationship, maybe he would explain those doubts to Geralt and maybe then Geralt would reassess whether he really did want to be stuck in a relationship with Jaskier.

Geralt walked past, his arms stacked high with plates and gave him an encouraging smile. Jaskier smiled back as he followed Vesemir into an empty study. He squared his shoulders to brace for whatever Vesemir would say.

“There’s no need to look so worried.” Vesemir told him as he closed the door behind them with a quiet click. “I swear, I do not have anything bad to say to you.”

“Well, that’s a relief.” Jaskier attempted to smile but his expression faltered because he could not stop his worry.

Vesemir placed his hands on Jaskier’s shoulders and looked him in the eye. “I wanted to thank you.”

“Thank… me? But I haven’t done anything.”

“No, I do not suppose you would realise what effect you have had.”

“E-excuse me? Effect on what?”

“On Geralt. You did not see what he was like before he met you. He was quiet. Introverted. He barely spoke to anyone, even his own brothers.”

Jaskier frowned, concerned. “He’s like that now.”

Vesemir chuckled quietly. “Yes. He is still quite shy but now he is able to talk to people, talk to strangers, even. He never could have done before. He never smiled either, before he met you.”

“He smiles all the time.” Jaskier said quietly, unsure what to do with this sudden flattery.

“He does now. And it is because of you he does so. Thank you, Jaskier, for making my son happy.” He tugged on Jaskier’s shoulders to bring him into a hug. Jaskier closed his eyes and rested his head on Vesemir’s shoulder. When had his own father hugged him last? He didn’t think the man’s hugs would measure up to this one. He found that, somehow, he no longer particularly cared about what his father did. Just for a little while.

* * *

Eskel stared at him for a minute before he began to speak. Jaskier felt himself begin to sweat nervously for the second time that day. Eskel did not notice his discomfort, or was at least good enough not to mention it.

“Geralt is different now.”

“O-oh?” Jaskier asked, intrigued. “Vesemir said something similar.”

“Yeah, I’m not surprised. Before you two got here today, he mentioned he wanted to thank you for treating Geralt so well.”

Jaskier blushed. “I haven’t done anything special, though. Geralt is the one who’s treating me well. He’s so sweet and kind and he takes such good care of me. You know, he keeps cooking me dinner almost every day and taking me on dates and he’s never even raised his voice at me, even though I know I can be annoying at times. He’s so perfect. Really, I should be the one thanking him for putting up with me.” He sighed dreamily and pressed his hands against his red cheeks, as though he could force the blood down from his face.

Jaskier chanced a glance at Eskel’s face, expecting to see annoyance or disgust spread across it at the obvious and pathetic gushing about his brother. But Eskel was beaming, looking amused and fond.

“Wow. I was not expecting that.”

“Sorry.” Jaskier whispered.

Eskel laughed and slowly reached out his hand to ruffle Jaskier’s hair fondly, making sure he could see his hand the entire time. Jaskier closed his eyes and leaned into the warm palm.

“Don’t be sorry, buddy.” He whispered back to him before letting his hand fall to his side. “You know, I meant to pull you aside to give you a shovel talk.”

“You did?”

“Yeah, I know it’s pretty late in the game to do it, but I was going to anyway. After that little speech, though, I really don’t think it’s needed.” Eskel snorted. “I knew Geralt was head over heels for you. He’s been sighing and staring longingly out of windows like a romance novel heroine since he met you. I didn’t realise you were just as embarrassingly in love with him as he is with you.”

Jaskier blinked up at him. Of course he was in love with Geralt! They had been together for almost three years now. He had thought he was ridiculously obvious with how much he loved Geralt. He had been certain everyone could tell how much he adored the man, even without his frequent monologues about Geralt’s positive qualities. He had no idea how to respond to someone – his friend and Geralt’s brother, no less – that hadn’t clued into that fact.

“You read romance novels?” Jaskier asked innocently.

“That’s none of your business.” Eskel gave Jaskier’s head one last pet before he turned and walked away, revealing a deep red flush crawling up the back of his neck.

Jaskier giggled.

* * *

“Jaskier! Please tell me I’m allowed to eat that delicious fucking pie now!”

“Babe, that’s not seriously what you wanted to talk to Jaskier in private for, is it? You looked so serious when you pulled us in here!”

“Everyone else got to have a private talk with Jaskier.” Lambert pouted.

* * *

Aiden watched Lambert with hearts in his eyes as Lambert devoured his large slice of pie and licked the plate afterwards. Geralt watched Jaskier with the same expression as Jaskier slowly ate his own slice of pie with a fork in a much more civilised manner. He hummed in pleasure as he took another bite. He _was_ a good baker! He was sure his pie had never tasted this good before. Maybe it was just the taste of Christmas? He had never been allowed to eat dessert on Christmas before even though he was always the one who made it. This year, he could not keep the tiny smile from his face.

Geralt, Lambert and Eskel had washed the dishes from the main course. Vesemir had refilled everyone’s glasses with wine. Aiden and Jaskier had sat around and looked pretty and only one of them felt a little guilty about it. Nobody had shouted at Jaskier or criticised his cooking. He was relaxed. On Christmas Day. Huh.

He took another bite of his apple pie and watched with satisfaction as his darling Geralt and his family all finished off their slices quickly, making delighted noises as they did. It was with a sick fascination that he watched Lambert pick his plate up and quite literally licked it clean.

“What the fuck, Lambert?”

“Shut up, Geralt! I’ve been looking forward to this pie all fucking day! Do you know how often pie this good comes along?”

“Hm… pretty much every month.”

“What!?”

“That’s how often Jaskier bakes them.”

“ _What!?_ For fuck’s sake, Geralt, you’ve been holding out on us? You’ve been getting pie every month and not sharing?”

Jaskier didn’t give all of his pies to Geralt, but Geralt didn’t bother defending himself at all. He only snorted at Lambert. “Fuck off.”

“Don’t speak to my boyfriend like that.” Aiden joked.

“No, Lambert’s right.” Eskel kicked Geralt under the table. “You’ve been keeping secret pies from us.”

“We demand pie!” Aiden slammed his hands on the table. “Give us the pie!”

Vesemir lifted an eyebrow and Jaskier thought for a moment that he was going to scold them for making so much noise or being too rough, before Jaskier remembered where he was and who he was with.

“Geralt, share your pie with your brothers.” Vesemir said, deadpan.

“It’s not _my_ pie, it’s my boyfriend’s.”

“Geralt, share your boyfriend with your brothers.”

“I wouldn’t be opposed.” Jaskier winked playfully at Eskel who wriggled his eyebrows in return. Geralt pouted and put his arms protectively around Jaskier’s shoulders.

“Why didn’t you wink at _me?_ ”

“Lambert, I don’t think you realise how horrifying you looked when you demolished that pie.”

“Aiden, tell him not to speak to your boyfriend like that.”

“Sorry, babe, I can’t. You heard Vesemir, he’s your boyfriend now too.”

“Aiden, don’t speak to my boyfriend like that.” Jaskier said. Lambert and Aiden snickered.

“Stop trying to steal Jaskier.” Geralt grumbled. Jaskier reached up and kissed Geralt on the cheek and his darling sighed and nuzzled his nose into Jaskier’s hair.

“You don’t need to annoy Geralt into it.” Jaskier smiled. “I can bake you pie whenever you want. You just have to ask!”

“You have unleashed a monster.” Geralt informed Jaskier seriously.

* * *

Jaskier hummed happily as he pulled another pie from the oven. He danced around the kitchen to place his latest creation on the counter. Two large hands circled his hips and he leaned back to rest on Geralt’s broad chest. Jaskier blushed as Geralt buried his face in his neck and pressed several tiny kisses to it.

“Beloved, every pie you make is perfect. You do not need to keep trying. What is the matter?”

“Nothing’s the matter, darling.”

“You usually only make so many when you are trying to impress your family.”

“Well… I suppose you could say that.” Jaskier admitted shyly. He turned around to snuggle into Geralt’s arms. “I’m baking them for Lambert… and Eskel… and Vesemir… and Aiden! They all wanted one and I did say they could ask whenever they wanted. I do like baking, you know, when it’s not being criticised so much and your family gave me such positive feedback. How could I say no to that?” He paused. “Is that...okay with you? That I’m baking for your family?”

“Beloved, they are your family too. As long as you are happy, then I am content.”

**Author's Note:**

> I'm running out of time to finish NaNoWriMo and I'm thousands of words behind. I wrote 6000 words today and most of them were on this fic so I hope you like it.
> 
> I felt bad for making Jaskier so tortured in the first fic I wrote so I wanted to give him a nice Christmas with a much nicer family. :D Please do let me know what you think!


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